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When I first arrived, I attended a community college. I practiced a trade, got a job. The first few months were good. I went out a lot, spent the money I made at night on dinners and drinks, then made it back during the day. I never went on dates - but the girls understood. They'd smile when I told them about her, the girl waiting back home. It's such a romantic idea.

Nothing lasts.

The rest of my money went to buying gifts. When I went out, we would go to malls and markets and fairs. I would see things - little lanterns, pink pencils, delicate rings, hand mirrors, picture frames. I knew her well enough to know what she would love them. So I bought them for her. I filled a drawer with these little things, then moved on to a second one.

Then threw them all out, after it all fell apart.

The only thing I saved was a photograph of us and the scarf. These were the only things I had before I left, the only things that still had a whisper of naivety.

It was a picture of us, at a zoo. I had taken her there in the summer time, so we could see the pandas. Even the Chinese have to wait, to see their own national treasures.

She looked like a baby that day. Hair in pigtails, wearing pastels and sneakers. I have to admit, I was slightly afraid to touch her, to kiss her. I didn't want anyone to mistake me for a pedophile. People have irrational fears, when they are not afraid for their lives.

She had a new camera - a present for herself, after long days at the bank. She took pictures of everything, all the animals, people with their kids walking along the paths. I laughed at the number of pictures she had of me, covering my face, hiding from the lens.

We - mostly she - tried to take pictures of ourselves together. She wanted one with the pandas, but it was too hard to get us all in the shot. "Let's ask someone to take it for us," she said, cheerfully.

"I don't know..." I said. "What if they take your camera?" I joked, half serious. China...haha...did not have the best track record with thieves.

"You are so negative. People are mostly good." With that, she walked over to the nearest person, a guy standing by a trash can. He followed us over, and nodded as she told him how to use the camera.

"Smile!" he said. "Let me take another one. This one was too close. You can't see the pandas." Slowly, he backed away, a step at a time. A step too far.

"Hey!" I shouted, as he turned and ran away. I started to chase him, but she held me back. "Let me go! I told you this would happen, he just stole your camera!"

"Yeah, and now he's gone. Don't worry. It's okay." She smiled, but it just made me angry. How dare he?

We left after that. She tried to cheer me up on the way home, but it was a moot point. I could have killed him for doing that to her. All the extra hours she worked, all the weekends she couldn't go out. She wasn't even mad. I don't know if that made it worse.

A few weeks later, she rang my doorbell, then ran in. "Look what came in the mail!"

She handed me an open envelope, and there were pictures - pictures of us at the zoo. I looked her, dumbfounded. "...What?" I gaped, like a fish out of water. "How...?"

"Here, read this, read this!" She pulled out a piece of paper from the envelope.

"Here are the photographs from the day I met you at the zoo. I'm sorry I took the camera - I needed the money. I hope this way, you can forgive me. You two looked really happy that day. I hope you stay like that. Sorry again."

"What the fuck?" I said. "How did he know your address?!"

"From this!" She handed me another photo. It was a picture of her, holding a sign.

I read it out loud. "Hello, my name is 安春 (Anchūn). This is my camera! If you have found it, please return the data card so I can have the pictures inside. The camera itself is yours! That is your reward for finding it! Thank you! :)"

My mind is blank. She smiled at me, waiting for my response, but I didn't know what to say. "...You make me speechless."

"I know. Anyways, here." She shuffles through the pictures, to the last one in the pile. "You can have this one. It's my favourite." It's the picture of us, by the pandas. The boy lied. You can see them perfectly, behind the glass fence. We do look happy.

She smiles. "Now I have to go to work. Have to save up again, for another camera."

When I left, she still didn't have enough for it, so that was the only picture we ever took together. I would have bought her another one, but all my money went to my plane ticket, to take me away from her.

Let me tell you now: it wasn't worth it.